- Created on Monday, 29 October 2012 19:03
By Nicole Williams, Founder of The Dating Diaries
I was sitting around talking with one of my girlfriends the other day, and the topic of men came up, as it always inevitably does.
I realized that not a single one of the my closest girlfriends has a man.
It saddened me, not only because I would love to go on some double dates with my girls, but because all of the women in my circle are attractive, educated, and overall good women.
Like the kind of women that any sane man should be proud to “claim” as his own.
Now I could see if my girls were the “exceptions “to the rule, especially since every friend thinks her friend is the greatest, however, in my travels around DC in different social circles, it appears as though an overwhelmingly large amount of women in this town are definitely single, Sex in the City style.
This newfound revelation got me to thinking, why are sooo many attractive, educated, seemingly nice women by most standards, so single in a town that has some of the most progressive, eligible bachelors this country has to offer?
After some personal observation I came up with my list of the Top Five Reasons why a woman could be single in the Chocolate City.
- Numbers Game
Let’s face it….women that are pretty, smart, and even “exotic” come a dime a dozen in this town.
Men that are equally attractive- or even not so attractive but think they are, that have status and money, don’t have to rush to choose just one woman, when the amount of thirst attractive and smart women display, allows them to keep their options open.
- Why Buy the Cow when You can Get the Milk for Free
I realized that all of my girls, even me , have been giving an overwhelming majority of the male interests in our lives, free access to our lives, bodies, minds, and sometimes even souls, virtually for free. I hate to sound like Steve Harvey but we really have not required the man of our desires to want or have to commit to us because we give him everything willingly without commitment. Like most people who are given free gifts, the recipient will just take take without giving anything in return.
- Unrealistic Expectations
We all pretty much want the man who over six feet tall is making a decent living for himself, when perhaps the brotha who is a hard worker but only 5’10’’ is getting overlooked.Ironically, no one in my close circle of friends has a list that’s ten feet tall or has dated a man that looks like ( insert man of your dreams here) , however, maybe they do have some quirky expectation that is just unrealistic in this day and age that coincides with a true man of character. After all, most of the married women that I do know, are not married to their typical “type” but to just a good man.
Yes I said it and I mean on the part of a lot of eligible bachelors in the DMV. Perhaps the male gaze is not going to women that don’t fit their unique box of what is of interest to them aesthetically, so if you don’t fall in that box, whatever it is, you will get overlooked. This translates to it’s their (men’s ) problem not yours!
At the end of the day, no matter what you want personally as a woman, if a man is not ready to settle down in either a relationship or marriage, he just won’t. There is nothing you can do or not do if that is not what he wants or where his head is. The common theme among those Iknow who are coupled up, is that their dude was just ready to be with one person for whatever reason, and the stars and moons aligned at the right time and in the right place for them to be together.
So DMV, What do you think? Why are so many women in DC single?